Reflection of my Seven Deadly Sins Paper

When I first read “All Seven Deadly Sins Committed at Church Bake Sale,” a few months ago, I thought the title seemed quite ironic. Who knew that the seven deadly sins would be present at a saintly church gathering? This immediately sparked an idea in my head. 
A few weeks prior to reading this paper, I had conflict present in my youth group. I felt like I was not fitting in because people were not acknowledging my presence. I tried to include myself, but they seemed to make it clear they didn’t want me around. I do not really know why. I thought this paper was the perfect opportunity to relieve stress.
 At first I struggled with organizing the paper. I did not know whether or not to write a paragraph on each sin or to go through the church school routine and include how the members sinned. I chose the second way. Matching the person to the sin was easy for me. I know the people well because I have been attending the same church since I was three and I know their “blind spots”. I tried to include many specific details to describe how each person fits their classified sin. 
When I read my draft again yesterday, I realized that there is no need to change anything. I matched a sin to seven members in my youth group and changed their name such that the first letter of their name was the same as the sin they were representing. I included many circumstances describing how each character sinned (eating doughnuts, the lesson, and four square). For example, "As he began to read aloud, Lucy pulls out a tiny pocket mirror from her fancy, shiny Dolce and Gabbana Purse and reapplies mascara. At this point she is practically sprawled out across Garret and Seth’s laps." Obviously, Lucy does not care enough about what is being taught in class and is only focused on her personal matters. I also made sure that each sin was evenly distributed; meaning that not one sin was mentioned more than the other. I truly feel that this piece perfectly describes a typical Sunday morning.
I spent more time on this draft than I have on any of the other drafts I have written this year. It has defiantly helped me relieve my anger for sure. Here is my paper:

Mr. White and the Seven Youth

 A typical youth group Sunday school class begins with yummy doughnuts and a life lesson based on the bible. For the remaining half hour, they practice their four square skills. On the floor of the youth group room, there is a large square with four alternating red and black tiles that was purposely placed there because of their love of the game. When all is said and done, they will head upstairs for the eleven o’clock church service. Seems like a great way to spend a Sunday morning right? Think again.

Mr. White, the Sunday school instructor, enters the youth group room carrying a box of doughnuts and his personal bible with sticky notes marking the passages that will be covered in the lesson that day. The sound of teenage stomachs growling fills the room as Mr. White sets the doughnuts down on the counter. He then heads over to the other end of the room, and writes down today’s topic on the white board easel.

Of course Gregory is the first one to approach the box. He grabs a glazed doughnut with chocolate frosting and a powdered jelly filled. “Don’t take the custard filled,” shouts Garret as he sprints over to the box. Garret absolutely hates when people try to take his all-time favorite flavor. Custard filled unfortunately tends to be the most favored amongst all of the members.

A short while later Lucy arrives fashionably late and gracefully walks on her tip toes to the doughnut box and grabs a cinnamon sugar doughnut.
“Lucy, could you ever be so kind enough as to grab me a cruller?” whispers a voice coming from the comfy leather couch.
“Sure thing Seth,” she responds sweetly. She reaches her recently manicured hand into the box and grabs the last cruller.
“Ow my feet hurt so freaking badly! I knew I shouldn’t have worn my new heels today,” she complains as she approached the couch. Her bright pink blouse looks slightly loose and she continuously has to hold down her shirt as she bends over. Because her hands are full, there is no way of preventing her shirt from falling open.
“Here Seth,” she says thoughtfully.  

Meanwhile Elena sits in the green chair, with her arms crossed, across from the couch Seth is currently lying on. She does not appreciate how Lucy can grab the attention of every guy in the room. Disgusted by what just happened, she waltzes over to the box and grabs one of the few remaining doughnuts and sits on a different couch to talk to Garret.

Peter enters the room shortly after with his keys jingling in his hands. “Hey everyone!” he exclaims as he gracefully walks to the doughnut box. He carefully cuts a glazed doughnut in half and leaves the second half for someone else. Gregory sees this from the corner of his eye and heads back up for thirds.

“Dude, that was like your fiftieth doughnut,” William points out and then continues to text. His comment seems rather unnecessary. He is not even hungry in the first place.

“Folks lets gather around for our weekly lesson,” Mr. White suggests. “Let’s all turn to page 401 and begin reading the first two paragraphs. Who would like to read?”

“I will since no one else ever volunteers,” Peter responds.

As he began to read aloud, Lucy pulls out a tiny pocket mirror from her fancy, shiny Dolce and Gabbana Purse and reapplies mascara. At this point she is practically sprawled out across Garret and Seth’s laps. Seth is dozing and almost unaware that Lucy is laying on him. If Seth isn’t sleeping, he’s texting his friends about his outstanding play at the football game the night before.  Garret is texting his girlfriend and counting the money he has in his wallet, making sure he has more than enough money to take her out to a movie and dinner later. Peter looks up occasionally as he reads, noticing his peers’ body language, sniffs at the disrespectfulness and continues on.

“What was that for?” William Wrath sneers.

“I’m just getting over a sinus infection and occasionally I have trouble breathing through my nose,” Peter lies arrogantly.

“Okay let’s continue on shall we?” Mr. White utters. Peter then again returns to reading the passage. Meanwhile Elena tries to focus, but can’t help but notice Lucy’s poor behavior. “Why can’t Garret pay attention to me sometimes?” She says to herself.

“Who would like to paraphrase this particular passage?” Mr. White asks.

There is no reply. It is so silent that you could hear a pin drop. Mr. White sighs and shares his interpretation with the rest of the group.

During this opportunity for discussion, Gregory is sitting on a neon green rocking chair with crumbs scattered on his shirt and a blob of chocolate frosting on the tip of his nose.

“Okay so that sums up what I wanted to talk to you about today,” Mr. White concludes.

“Time for four square,” Garret shouts enthusiastically as he runs over to the closet to grab the ball.

At this point everyone except Gregory and Seth run over to the large square.

“I want to stand in the king square first,” Garret Greed announces.

“Fine, but let’s see how long you stay in the game,” William nags.

Lucy hits the ball into Garret’s square and then Garret hits it into William’s square. William tries to spike it, but it lands out of bounds.

“Dude, you’re out,” Peter claims.

“Nuh uh. Did u see the way Garret hit it? It was a horrible shot,” William argues.

“I totally just saw that play and you’re out,” Gregory observes.

“Whatever. You suck!” William snaps as he heads to the back of the line.

“Yes! Now I can be in the king square,” Peter boasts as he enters the game.  He then picks up the ball and bounces it into Garret’s square. Garret, quickly trying to retrieve it, misses.

“VICTORY” Peter exclaims.

“Really Peter? Really?” Garret snaps as he goes over to the couch to keep Seth company.

 “I’m the champion of this game,” Peter brags as Elena takes Garret’s spot. Peter throws the ball into Elena’s square. She misses the ball and trips over it.

“Ugh, I suck at this game,” she states.

“That’s mucho embarrassing,” William snidely points out as Elena heads to the back of the line for the umpteenth time.

“Guys its five of. We should probably start heading upstairs,” Mr. White announces.

At this point everyone freezes. Garret sprints over to the closet and puts the four square ball into a box. Seth creeps over to the fridge to grab a coke so he can stay awake during the service. Lucy, noticing a button came undone, buttons up her shirt and looks at herself in the bathroom mirror to make sure she has enough foundation on to cover up the acne on her forehead. Garret replies to his girlfriend via texting with a quick “I love you”, turns off his phone, and catches up to Lucy grabbing her arm. Gregory begins to head up the stairs shortly after.

“Dude you look like Rudolf the Brown Nosed Reindeer,” William points out indicating that the chocolate frosting was still present on his face.

“Hold up Gregory. I’ll get it off for you,” Lucy giggles as she heads over to the sink to get a wet paper towel. She gracefully wipes his nose and smiles.

“He is totally capable of doing that himself,” William storms. He shakes his head and begins to text as he walks up to service. Surprisingly he does not loose his footing as he attempts to do these things simultaneously. 

“He has a girlfriend. She shouldn’t be leading him on like that. Her outfits are too risqué for church. Why isn’t Garret ever interested in me?” All of these thoughts travel through Elena’s brain as she heads upstairs to service. Peter follows her up arrogantly with his head held high.

“Good morning!” the ushers greet as they pass out the bulletins to each of the seven youth. They enter the sanctuary with a smile on each of their faces. Gregory Gluttony, Garret Greed, Peter Pride, Lucy Lust, Elena Envy, Seth Sloth, and William Wrath file into their usual pew and listen to the preacher intently. How ironic!